Archive for the ‘The Revolution’ Category

iDeA – Metal Gears Solid Shhhh!

Friday, August 27th, 2010

i’m a big fan of the metal gears series of games. i love the way solid snake crawls in the grass and gets everybody. i particularly like it when he chokes people out. yea, take that mr collins head of year 9!!!

anyway, ive been stuck on my own in the house since Monday because dad has gone away to fight the lizards and mum is staying with her auntie violet, so ive had plenty of time to think about the next metal gears sold game.

ok so first of all lets get rid of solid snakes. the name of the new hero is stefan vee. he is an anglo-japanese supersoldier made from fire and he lives in an apartment in new york. sure he likes chicks but he doesn’t need them. then one day liquid snake comes round to his flat in a car with bombs on it and starts messing about, so stefan and his sidekick dan B (deaf) knock him out COLD.

i think this would be a great game because it would operate in 5d which is 3d but with added Death and Destruction. also the soundtrack is by doctor dre and fleetwood mac (random).

if you press up down left right square triangle square on the title screen you get to play half life 2 (if you want).

the emphasis of the game is stealth though so sometimes you cant see whats happening but its ok because in that way its like life.
here is a little screen shot i have mocked up:

stealth!!!!

so that’s my idea for metal gear solid shhhhh! I hope you like it it costs £70 and comes with a free mouse mat with has a laser pen built in.

\sv/

The Manifesto

Wednesday, June 9th, 2010

Ladies and gentleman, the revolution will not be televised. It will be streamed through a high-powered SDSL line from my bedroom.

That’s right, earthlings, no longer will Steve Vai be pwned by the government and the Powers That Beef. Me and my friend BloodTowel69 (Dave C) are going to RAWK the internet like a thing that just don’t care (like 50 Cent crossed with a man with a real gun). If you don’t believe us, click here.

Pwned! n00b!

Anyway, the rules behind our Mission our few, simple and powerful:

1. To break all shackles around our lives
2. No anthropomorphism.
3. Do something ironic/from the 1980s
4.
BOOOOOOM!
Innit.

Swish.

Now that the rules are out of the way, I’d like to show you Phase One-Alpha of our Mission: humiliating suits in chat rooms!

Tuesday 8th June 05:18
Vai: hi
38yearoldman: hey, how are you?
Vai: WHY ARE YOU TALKING TO ME I’M REALLY 12!
38yearoldman: huh?
Vai: PPEEEEAAAADDDDDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

Haha, we totally mindfudged that guy!

Here’s another…

Tuesday 8th June 06:55
Vai: hi there im a 15-year-old girl
38yearoldman: im sorry im not interested
Vai: OMG YOU REPLIED WHAT A PERV!!!!!!

LOLZEPAN! He never saw us coming!

Tuesday 8th June 07:01
Vai: Hey there!
Your chat partner has logged out.

Looks like word of the mission is spreading! People are running like runners!!!!

We’re like the KLF but with word-keyboards, basically. We’re like those guys your mother waned you about. We’re the internet’s answer to Fonejacker, except we hide behind computers millions of miles away rather than a mask. You get us? BANG! You’ve got us now.

This week’s plan involves me and BloodTowel69 hitting up some webcam chatrooms and blowing some minds. We’re basically spreading the word about the impending New World Order and then we’re gonna get a pizza in.

Gonna be a busy one, folks – but someone’s gotta do it!

\sv/