Archive for the ‘the vai files’ Category

raw cm punk for wwe

Tuesday, July 19th, 2011

i stayed up for last nights monday night raw with the help of my leaflet and a whole load of coffee, and boy was i not disappointed! another unpredictable night of action in which triple h… the king of kings… came back as the new wwe ceo!!!

triple h vince mcmahon wwe raw

photo courtesy of wwe.com

i mean its about time vince was oustead from the company 4 REAL because that guys got so much stuff to answer for over the years. i mean, were not talking a lawsuit like that you get in HR for small businesses when something goes wrong or whatever, we are talking industrial craziness!!!

one sad thing about wwe raw last night is that cm punk was not there. thats understandable considering he is not under contract or whatever but youd think vince or even triple h wouldve at least tried to get him to have a match or something???

anyway, its great to see cm punk is having a right laugh on the cm punk twitter with the belt, but ive also been having a laugh too. that leaflet i had delviered to my house ON A SUNDAY (????) is great and i keep rereading and rereading it over and over. ive done some research into the crazy bus lady and ive found out that she is a bit of a cult legend.. in manchester!

so the question is why has this been posted under my door? and on a sunday? crazy bus lady has obviously had her problems with the lizards in the past so it might just be that this is a crazy for help.

is it time to reopen the vai files and start expos-ecuting the lizards like it aint no thang once more? hey, i dont wear this foil hat and carry a rolling pin everywhere i go because im an idiot. lets go to work….

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tHe VaI fIlEs #921235

Monday, June 13th, 2011

because its monday and theres nothing going on in the house except that tapping noise ive decided to reopen the vai files. if you dont know what the vai files are they are basically my own personal files i have made about everyone on earth. i have split them into the following categories:

  • tracey chapman
  • ultimate warrior
  • miscellaneous

the first fact file i was going to share was going to be about food pr i.e. “why is there no blue food?” but i have decided against this in flavour (hehe) of something, or someONE, a little more… tasty (to the lizards…)

DAVRO!!!

the above clip is part of a much wider conspiracy way bigger than even hull! firstly, the ‘official line’ is that the idea of putting bobby in the stocks was a last minute addition to the show. it wasnt. how do i know this? lets look at the three who put him in the stocks…

blair
Name: lionel BLAIR (= ‘liar… b’)
Age: infinite
Rhythm: plenty

lionel blair is a well known old dancer, but hmmmmm nobody actually remembers when he had a career. sounds a bit suspect no? so what would he have to gain from bobby davros ‘accident’? well, blair hasnt aged in 20 years so he obvz dabblez in the black arts, and with the uk’s funniest magician (davro) out of the question, well… it opens up a spot doesnt it?

chegz
Name: keith chegwin (‘cheg#FAIL’)
Age: 33
Swap: shop

if theres one thing ive learned from my terrible virgin media customer service treatment its that keith chegwin will do anything for money. hes not the brains behind this operation, but he could be the scalpel. or at least the hands. hands wearing gloves. in the night…

chegz
Name: jim bowen
Age: h
Bulls: Aye

dinosaur is it, jim? this is the man behind it all, trust vai. the way in which he dazily looks around as davro falls, pretending he isnt pulling the strings behind the whole damn thing, is despicable. cant beat of a bit of bully, jim? you are a bully pal, and you should be ashsamed you lizard!!!

join me next time when i get to the bottom of grange hill series 7, episode 9.

\sv/

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